Atika Sikun

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Sept 14th, 1992 | Selangor, MY
"we only see what we want to see."

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Friday, February 4, 2011 | Posted by Atika | 4 comment/s

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I'm sure you'd said , " I didn't ask for you to do all the things for me, did I ? " when you finished reading this post.

Well , here's a newsflash for you, I am here to say , I had enough . I just had enough. I tried to be sensible. I really did. I'm sorry if I am not worthy enough to hear what have gone wrong with you , I'm sorry that I betrayed the faith you had in me , I'm just . . . sorry . I'm not asking you to give your utmost attention to me , but really , I wondered why were you acting such ways? IS IT SOMETHING I SAID ? SOMETHING I TOLD YOU ABOUT ? Tell me , please ?

*long dreaded sigh* :|

Maybe you want to be alone . Maybe something happened , and well , you don't want to tell me . Takpe lah you. Memang i salahkan diri i atas apa yang berlaku . Even if it doesn't has anything to do me . I failed to be a good friend for you . I failed terribly this time . Atika memang kawan yang memang tak boleh diharap kan? I hope you're happy that I'm all miserable now. I da penat ouh . Maybe bila you baca , you'll say " Aku tak suruh pun kau risau pasal aku kan ? " Fortunately I am worried about you. You are the bestf , and you have been one of the closest eversince I started college.

I can be mad at you if I want to . but I choose not to. I am being rational here. I tried to put myself in your shoes . I tried to understand your situation. I REALLY DID. what more can you ask for ? I left you alone , with the hope that you will feel much better . YES , I am emo-eh . I'm all emo-eh because my own good friend is NOT talking to me :| YES , I am miserable because I'm blaming myself for everything that happened. *sighhhhhhhhhhhh* Sensibility isn't enough for you ay ? Call me childish , call me whiny baby all because I am afraid to lose you as a friend. Just so you know , I am one of those people who treasured my friendship to the fullest. Just please , dont this to me alright ? it hurts really bad.

Just shut me away if you don't need me anymore. At least tell me ? Don't leave me puzzled all alone.

I just want to be happy like I used to. I'll move on from now on. I want to reach the sky . and it's up to you now whether you're coming with me or not . Sorry , kalau I ada buat salah ke , or berdosa dekat you. Memang salah I. I'm not a good friend . I failed terribly.

You left me with a big question in my head. The moments that we shared together are no longer there.You used to ask me how am I doing everyday.But now, all that I felt is the coldness. I'm sorry. I want us to be like we used to be. laughter. joy. happiness. When yours seems to fade away,I'm trying hard not to abandon the friendship with hatred.

Just so you know , I respect your decision in erm , deciding everything. I am still here and will always be there. and then again , I'm sorry if somehow I've hurt you in any ways.Forgive me.

Thank you for everything.